6 Stoic Lessons For a Peaceful and Happy Life.
Most of us are stressed, and others are overworked. Choosing empty productivity over mental peace. Some of us are fighting an addiction, and some of us are living in toxic relationships.
Or you are someone who despite having everything in their life, still finds a reason to be unhappy, and wonder, how did I end up here?
Many of us are searching for inner peace, tranquility, steadiness, & inner calm in our fast-paced lives.
What is the best way to live?
How can I deal with the difficult situations I face?
How should I handle the success and power that I hold?
And we are constantly battling these questions in our heads.
Relax, Stoicism got you covered.
Stoicism was a school of philosophy founded in Athens in the early 3rd century BC.
These four virtues (self-control, courage, justice, wisdom) are responsible for our happiness & it is our perception of things rather than the things themselves that cause the most trouble. I know what you are thinking. How does a philosophy so ancient contain anything relevant to modern life?
But fortunately, the answer is YES. It contains some of the greatest wisdom in the history of the world. Stoicism aimed at the unpredictable nature of everyday life & offered a set of practical tools required to live a life of clarity, calmness, & tranquility.
The complete stoic philosophy is divided into three major frameworks:
1. The Discipline of Perception: It simply means how we perceive the world around us, it is our failure to perceive things in a clear light that brings a lot of mental misery.
2. The Discipline of Action: It is the actions you take to become the person you want to be, words are just that: words, the discipline of action means choosing the right thing to do no matter how difficult it seems at a time.
3. The Discipline of Will: The willingness or the acceptance that there are a lot of things outside of our control and we can’t change or control them. A lot of our anxiety comes from trying to control things that are meant to be accepted as they are.
So keeping these three disciplines in mind here are 6 stoic lessons that will help you live a peaceful life.
Lesson 1: Control & Choice
The world is divided into two different things, the ones we have control over and the ones we have no control over what’s so ever. But we live our life fretting, getting stressed, fearing, worrying, and yelling over the things or situations or people that we can’t control.
As the stoics said every moment you spend worrying, yelling, or fretting over the things you can’t control is the time taken away from things you can handle. It is the same as using all of your bodily force to move a concrete wall and we all know the result of that.
Whenever you are faced with a difficult situation or find yourself worrying over something or someone just asks yourself, what is in your control? If it’s not under your control, just accept it and if it is under your control, then do something about it. In both cases, you’ll be happy.
Lesson 2: Only Bad Dreams
“We suffer more in our imagination than in reality.” — Lucius Annaeus Seneca
The stoics believed that many of the things that upset us are a figment of our imagination. We can recollect so many incidents of our past where we just imagined the worst things possible and suffered, were stressed, frustrated, or afraid only to realize later that nothing happened. We took the stress for nothing & got upset for nothing.
The anticipation of pain causes more pain than the actual pain. So stop anticipating, and imagining things or events that may never occur.
Lesson 3: Limit your inputs
Have you heard of a saying: Garbage in and garbage out? That’s precisely what happens when we drown ourselves with information. Information that we should not consume for our own good. It is okay to not be on top of everything, it is completely fine to not know about the latest trend, latest gadget, or other majorly negative news that we consume on a daily basis.
It makes us perceive that the world is not a good place, we are not safe, and makes us anxious for no reason at all.
In his book, Stillness is the key Ryan holiday said
“The important stuff will still be important by the time you get to it. The unimportant stuff will have made its insignificance obvious(or simply disappeared). Then, with stillness rather than needless urgency or exhaustion, you will be able to sit down and give what deserves consideration your full attention.”
Every piece of information has one goal only: it is to capture your attention. It is a currency that far outweighs any currency on this planet. Use it wisely and use it for people and things that are meaningful to you.
Lesson 4: Don’t explain your philosophy, embody it
Peace, happiness, tranquillity, and steadiness come from taking action. The goal is to turn your words into works. A lot of our anxiety, regret, and frustration come from hesitating to take the first step. It is in these moments you feel helpless and it takes away your peace and happiness.
Taking the first step will build self-esteem within you, you’ll respect yourself a little more and ultimately love yourself a little more after that.
“Righteousness is beautiful.”
In the book, The daily stoic Stephen Hanselman & Ryan Holiday said “Here is how to guarantee you have a good day: do good things to yourself and others as well. Any source of joy is outside your control or is nonrenewable. But this one is all you, all the time, and unending. It is the ultimate form of self-reliance.”
Lesson 5: We all are going to die
Don’t get scared. Many people see death as something we should not talk about. It is considered something sad and tragic. But the stoic didn’t see death like that. They see it in a completely different light.
Every person is born with a death sentence, each second that passes you’ll never get back. It is not just happening with you it is happening with everyone around you. Once you come to terms with this reality, you’ll start embracing each and every moment of your life because you will never get it back.
“Don’t die before you die, live a little bit.”
Lesson 6: Stop carrying the load of other people’s opinions of you on yourself
It comes down to the same thing, do we have control over other people’s opinions? No matter what you do or don’t do in your life: one thing will remain common and that is people will have opinions. Good or bad that doesn’t matter but they will have something to say. People who barely know you will be obliged to have an opinion of you.
Ask yourself do you want to obsess over their opinions. It brings nothing but misery.
A well-known stoic Marcus Aurelius famously said, “It never ceases to amaze me: we all love ourselves more than other people but care more about their opinions than our own.”
He couldn’t have said it in a better way. We should clean our own house before we set out to clean the world so Instead of caring about what other people have to say about us, we should refrain in a way that we’ll never become that person who passes or forms judgments or opinions about anyone without being asked.
It will save you a lot of unasked stress and overthinking and you’ll be able to live your life more peacefully.
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